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December 2011

New Year Resolutions

It is a funny time of year, is it not? After the festive season comes the end of year celebrations…and for many some resolutions to kick off the new year. Many resolutions will get no further than the lips of the person that spoke them. Some make it to late January and fade into the overwhelm of normal life. And occasionally…very occasionally..some make it to reality. Often these ‘NYE wishes’ …Read More

Reality Strategies

Do you believe in Santa? The Easter Bunny? The Tooth Fairy? How about that your ‘problem’ can’t change? Or that the thing you are scared of is so bad? Often people develop fixed ideas – rigidities in their thinking. They globalize their problem (it is everywhere!) and create, from this, ideas of reality which do not exist. This is one way to entrench a fear or problem. Kids learn about …Read More

The spirit of Christmas

Christmas is almost upon us. Regardless of your beliefs, ‘Christmas’ takes on a powerful presence in the calendar – signaling an end to 2011 and a short pause before 2012 begins. I have been observing how people are responding to this time of year. There is an interesting mix of fear, shame, entitlement, greed anger and relief that is on show. The rate of mental wellness issues seems to sky-rocket …Read More

The fear of hope

Often I hear clients tell me what they ‘hope’ will happen in the future.  Working with someone in London, it became clear that hope in this case was really the ‘fear of expressing the fear’.  Rather than saying ‘I fear that this will happen’, they were expressing ‘I hope that the opposite will happen’.   Hope is not a bad thing – when it is based on realistic optimism.  However, …Read More

Time orientation

Time orientation. I was visiting Berlin and working with clients. Berlin is almost my second home, after living there for 6 years. Going back for me is special, and brings up many memories. It reminds me that we can assume interesting orientations to time. What is healthy is to reflect on the past with nostalgia and an understanding of the lessons that it learned. We can look forward with structured …Read More

Motivation

Motivation Motivation is only the start. Having a realistic goal, creating a workable strategy and knowing how to overcome any obstacles to get back on track is the way to true success. Live Well Phil    

Living a goal or a purpose?

Are you living a goal or a purpose? Whilst working in Vienna this week, I met many interesting people and lots of old friends. One of my old friends really showed how he lived his purpose every day- he used this as his compass for everything in his life. I contrast this with many others that I worked with, who were living for their ‘goal’. They lived very different lives …Read More